What's the greatest diss track in the history of popular music? "Ether" by Nas? "The Bitch in Yoo" by Common?
The correct answer is "You Oughtta Know" by Alanis Morissette.
Yes. "You Oughtta Know," that spiteful tirade against Uncle Joey from Full House. Alanis truly is the angriest woman in the history of Canada. Seriously, you have to be the most mean-spirited, heartless, and cruelest bitch in the world in order to write a song dedicated to emasculating Uncle Joey. UNCLE JOEY, folks! That's just wrong. On so many levels.
See, here's why I believe "You Oughtta Know" is the most threatening diss track ever recorded. The other week, when I was walking through a parking lot, I heard this chick just blasting that song from her car stereo. Her windows were rolled down and she was cruising, playing that song at max volume. I have never, ever heard anyone blast Alanis Morissette in public like that.
It takes some serious balls to not be ashamed of blasting one of Alanis' songs. I would not want to cross the chick who is tough enough to boast, through her choice of pop music, her unbridled and extensive man-hate. I feared for my masculinity when that chick's car rolled past me. I had to go straight to Big 5 so I could buy a cup to protect my manhood.
Saturday, November 24, 2007
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Family Trip
I recently went on a short vacation with my family, grandma, and uncle and aunt from Canada. We traveled to Las Vegas for the weekend by plane, and took a side trip to the Grand Canyon by car. I've been to Las Vegas before, and my impression of the city isn't very positive. Who wants to travel to a city where there are smokers seemingly everywhere? Ventures through casinos usually have me holding my chest in pain. I definitely appreciate California laws that don't allow smoking at most indoor public places. Man, I wish people who smoke would stop, for the sake of their loved ones who are around them, and for themselves as well. Of course the task is much easier to say than do.
Alas, I have strayed from my main topic. Las Vegas and the Grand Canyon. I'd say the only reason I went to Las Vegas was for the family time, seeing that my oldest sister is engaged and the family might not have future opportunities to go on a vacation together. But due to circumstances, both my sisters weren't able to attend. That was a downer, but there were highlights to the trip. I was able to spend time with my parents and grandma, as well as my uncle and aunt who I rarely see. Canadians really do frequently say "eh" by the way.
JOKE: How did the 3 discoverers of Canada come up with the country's name? (Answer at the end of the blog entry)
Another highlight of the trip, was a restaurant. Sushi Factory. Oh boy, I think I mostly loved this place because of the cheap cost. Many tourists may never eat there, as it is off the strip. Big mistake. My meal consisted of beef teriyaki, salmon teriyaki, and shrimp tempura rolls (6). The total cost for this was only $10.75, with good size portions. Not only was the cost cheap, but the food delicious. I could easily tear the beef teriyaki with my teeth and let its savory taste permeate through every nook and cranny in my mouth. Also, the place was run by Japanese people. Usually, I prefer Japanese people cooking Japanese food, Mexican people cooking Mexican food, etc. Its more authentic eh? So if you go to Las Vegas, pay this place a visit.
I also went to see a show at the MGM Grand called "Ka." I don't have much to say about the show, as I had a bit of a hard time following the plot. But I will say that the effects and stunts of the show were fantastic. I think "Ka" is better than the "blue man group" show.
Grand Canyon. I think that may have been the best part of the trip. It was unfortunate we couldn't stay there that long. If there is another family trip soon, I'll recommend staying at the Grand Canyon and taking a side trip to Las Vegas. Nature is sweet, no question. It would be great if I could bring a lawn chair a chill in the Grand Canyon. While looking at the Grand Canyon, I came up with an idea. Wouldn't it be funny if me and others threw a football into one the canyon's crevices each visit? Slowly a mound of footballs could accumulate, and you could see a canyon with a tumor consisting of footballs! Anyhow, for realz, the Grand Canyon was sweet. Definitely neat seeing the Colorado River snake through the canyon as well.
Yup, that was my trip, goodbye.
Answer: The three discoverers each decided to contribute one letter to the country's name.
1st man: "C eh"
2nd man: "N eh"
3rd man: "D eh"
Alas, I have strayed from my main topic. Las Vegas and the Grand Canyon. I'd say the only reason I went to Las Vegas was for the family time, seeing that my oldest sister is engaged and the family might not have future opportunities to go on a vacation together. But due to circumstances, both my sisters weren't able to attend. That was a downer, but there were highlights to the trip. I was able to spend time with my parents and grandma, as well as my uncle and aunt who I rarely see. Canadians really do frequently say "eh" by the way.
JOKE: How did the 3 discoverers of Canada come up with the country's name? (Answer at the end of the blog entry)
Another highlight of the trip, was a restaurant. Sushi Factory. Oh boy, I think I mostly loved this place because of the cheap cost. Many tourists may never eat there, as it is off the strip. Big mistake. My meal consisted of beef teriyaki, salmon teriyaki, and shrimp tempura rolls (6). The total cost for this was only $10.75, with good size portions. Not only was the cost cheap, but the food delicious. I could easily tear the beef teriyaki with my teeth and let its savory taste permeate through every nook and cranny in my mouth. Also, the place was run by Japanese people. Usually, I prefer Japanese people cooking Japanese food, Mexican people cooking Mexican food, etc. Its more authentic eh? So if you go to Las Vegas, pay this place a visit.
I also went to see a show at the MGM Grand called "Ka." I don't have much to say about the show, as I had a bit of a hard time following the plot. But I will say that the effects and stunts of the show were fantastic. I think "Ka" is better than the "blue man group" show.
Grand Canyon. I think that may have been the best part of the trip. It was unfortunate we couldn't stay there that long. If there is another family trip soon, I'll recommend staying at the Grand Canyon and taking a side trip to Las Vegas. Nature is sweet, no question. It would be great if I could bring a lawn chair a chill in the Grand Canyon. While looking at the Grand Canyon, I came up with an idea. Wouldn't it be funny if me and others threw a football into one the canyon's crevices each visit? Slowly a mound of footballs could accumulate, and you could see a canyon with a tumor consisting of footballs! Anyhow, for realz, the Grand Canyon was sweet. Definitely neat seeing the Colorado River snake through the canyon as well.
Yup, that was my trip, goodbye.
Answer: The three discoverers each decided to contribute one letter to the country's name.
1st man: "C eh"
2nd man: "N eh"
3rd man: "D eh"
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